The god of Emotions

   Now, if you are a guy trying to read this post, it may not make alot of sense to you since you operate on a more 'rational' level (at least that's what I've heard), but you are welcome to persevere and see what you can get out of this.

   I have never thought of myself as an overly emotional person. I mean, sure I tear up at the end of a sad movies, and funerals, and end of camp speeches like any self respecting girl. Sometimes I even get a little misty when I have been provoked and frustrated beyond the call of duty, but I never fly off the handle. (I leave that to my sister! hehe!) I don't become irrevocably depressed when things don't go my way, I don't have frequent and dramatic mood swings, and I don't fall to pieces when the guy I like gets a girlfriend. (which of course rarely happens!) So, I must not be an overly emotional person! Right? Ya, well, I was wrong. I am just as much of a slave to my emotions, as the girl that goes through Kleenexes like a smoker through cigarettes, except I think I'm worse. The worship of my emotions is causing me to pay a higher price than any Kleenex box, it is causing me to sacrifice a growing knowledge of and love for my Savior! 

   You see, I've been nursing a cold, since Friday (courtesy of Mrs. Amy Smith), and when I get sick, even just a little, it wipes me out! I am not one of those who can bravely march through illness without complaint. Nope, when I get sick, I need: my bed, my medicine, my mommy and some old movies, along with lots of rest and possibly my own drink refiller. Through this, I have been neglecting God. But I'm soooo tired, and I'm  sure God want's me to get my rest so I can feel better instead of waking up early to spend time with Him. He really couldn't expect me to be able to concentrate on prayer and reading the Bible with my head hurting so bad. Well, you know, I'm sure He wouldn't mind if I skipped my devotions, since I really need to catch up on something else, just this once won't hurt! Sound familiar? But the thing is, these excuses aren't just reserved for when I'm sick. If I'm tired in the morning, I turn off my alarm. If there is a really good movie on or I'm behind on laundry I postpone my quiet time. If I am reading a good book.... you get the point. Then God tapped on my shoulder and showed me how I was allowing my emotions to dictate what I did and did not do. He showed me that it is possible to control them, not in my strength but in His. As I was mulling all this over, He showed me once more how my emotions were taking over, by leading me to todays Revive Our Hearts which was on, guess what? Exactly, emotions! Is He good or what? I can only praise Him for His faithfulness in taking situations that have to potential to draw me away from Him, and turning them into learning moments that can propel me farther into my walk with Him. How great is our God!

Sunrise

²²It is through the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.

²³They are new every morning; great is Thy faithfulness.

                                                         -Lamentations 3:22-23

These verses were the first things to come to mind as the wake up committee (aka Lacey) opened my curtains this morning. I had been dreading getting out of bed, until I caught a glimpse of the glorious sun shining in my window and the all around "spring look". This wouldn't have made such an impact on me though, had yesterday not been dark and dreary. I think that sometimes that is how life is, dark days and nights come, but with them come's the hope of the next morning, hope of the sun. And when we experience the darkness, the light seem's so much more beautiful! This isn't going to be a long or eloquent post, but I hope that this beautiful truth encourages you as it did me. Oh, how faithful our God is!

Mary's Bible

I first read this in the transcript of a Revive our Hearts broadcast, and it made me realize how often I take the Bible for granted. I hope it will convict and challenge you as much as it did me.

“I must have a Bible of my own! I must have one, if I have to save up for it for ten years!"

The year was 1794. For as long as she could remember, little Mary Jones had yearned to hold a Bible in her hands so that she might read it for herself. For years, she had sat at night on her weaver father’s lap and listened to him tell stories of Abraham and Joseph and David and Daniel. But her family was far too poor to afford a Bible, even if one had been available, for Bibles could scarcely be found in all of Wales during those days.

Two years earlier, Mrs. Evans, the wife of a nearby farmer, having learned of Mary’s longing to read the Bible, had promised the child that when she learned to read, she could come to their house and read their Bible. As soon as the first school opened in a neighboring village, Mary had eagerly set about learning to read.

Now, the ten-year-old girl had just walked two miles from the North Wales village of Llanfihangel to the Evans’ farm. The distance was no object to the eager child: "I’d walk further than that for such a pleasure, ma’am!" she had said to Mrs. Evans.

When once Mary finally was left alone in the room with the Bible, she reverently lifted off the white napkin that covered and protected the cherished book. Then, with trembling hands, she opened the book to the fifth chapter of John where her eyes lit on the words, "Search the Scriptures; for in them ye think ye have eternal life: and they are they which testify of Me" (John 5:39 KJV). Confident that God had spoken to her directly, she earnestly vowed to search His Word with all her heart.

Every Saturday from that point on she made the journey to the Evans’ farm, where she read, studied, and memorized entire chapters from the ‘borrowed’ Bible. All the time, however, her heart ached, so great was her yearning to have a Bible of her own. She purposed that she must have a Bible, at any cost.

For the next six years, in addition to her studies at school and the many chores to be tended to at home, Mary used every available moment to do odd jobs for friends and neighbors. Every penny she earned was carefully laid aside, until, at long last she had saved enough to buy a Bible of her own.

When she learned that the closest place a Bible could be purchased was the town of Bala, some twenty-five miles away, there was no question in her mind about what she must do. With hope in her heart, she started out early one morning, walking barefoot, so as not to ruin her one pair of shoes. Before she reached her destination, her feet were blistered and cut from the stones in the road.

Physically weary, but barely able to contain her excitement that her lifelong goal should be so nearly realized, Mary finally arrived in Bala, where she poured out her story to the minister, Mr. Charles. When she had finished, Mr. Charles reluctantly informed her that the last of the Bibles available for purchase had already been sold and that the handful of remaining Bibles had already been promised to others. Furthermore, the Society that had printed the small quantity of Welsh Bibles did not intend to print any more.

So great was Mary’s disappointment, that she began to sob uncontrollably. Touched by the intensity of her passion to have a Bible of her own, Mr. Charles decided that she must have one of the few Bibles left in his possession. Words cannot describe the ecstasy Mary felt as Mr. Charles placed into her hands that precious treasure for which she had prayed, wept, and hoarded all these years. Her heart sang as she walked the twenty-five miles back home, carrying her very own Bible, the Book that would remain her dearest friend and companion throughout her life.

Abide in Me

⁴ Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. ⁵ I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.

                                                                   -John 15:4-5


   This year, instead of making a list of resolutions that I won't keep, I decided to choose a word that correlates with a verse to use as my 'word of the year'. Can you guess what it is? Yes, it's 'Abide'! God really laid this concept on my heart last month, as He took me through a cleansing process. He brought me to a place where I saw myself as I am, and showed me that as long as I tried to make myself holy, I would fail, but if I let Him mold me, then I could gain even greater ground. At first it was hard for me to understand how doing nothing could accomplish anything, but then He showed me that I could do something, I could simply abide in Him. So this is my goal this year: to learn to abide in Christ every moment of every day. I have found that listening to an audio bible as I clean my room or do laundry is a very practical way to accomplish this. (here is the one I listen to online) There are a lot of verses that come to life when you hear them compared to simply reading them. Another way that I'm working on, is choosing a verse or quote to meditate on if I have some mental down time, such as while I'm doing laundry or sweeping the floor, and you can't beat prayer as a way to stay close to God. I would love to hear some of your thoughts on this, and if you have any ideas for practically living out the call to abide in Christ I would love for you to share them!

Thank You!!!

   I can't believe it's a new year already! It seems like we were just starting 2011 a couple of weeks ago and now we are in 2012. I would like to take a minute to send out a 'Thank You' to some people who encouraged and impacted my life in 2011. Just as an aside, I will not be able to get everybody on here that I'm thankful for or that I love, but I would like to mention a few that don't get thanked enough.



My Mom- I would like to thank her mostly because she thinks that I'm ungrateful... kidding!!! Actually she is one of the best moms in the whole world. She knows when to be a friend and when to be a parent. She struggles against Fibromyalgia everyday to take care of us, and others, even when no one else knows. She loves and serves my dad unconditionally and is a wonderful example of how I should one day love and serve my husband. She is not perfect, but she works to overcome her imperfections and I believe that is one of the best legacy's any mother could leave her children. So thank you Mommy for just being you!

My Dad- My dad is the smartest person I know! He can tell you everything you ever wanted to know about politics, economics, church doctrine, end time prophecies, history, math, computers, English... (I think you get the point) and if he doesn't know he finds out. He puts up with three girls and is not above sitting down to watch Pride and Prejudice or Anne of Green Gables with us. And lest you think that takes man point away from him, I should probably tell you that he can also fix just about anything, and often drags, I mean brings, us along to teach us something of the handyman persuasion. (How to build a fence has been the most recent lesson) He supports me in my ventures, even if he doesn't always understand or agree, and he consistently encourages me to delve deeper into my interests. Thank you Daddy for always standing behind me and encouraging me in everything I do.

Lauren- For being my best friend! You and I don't always get along, but we are always able to put our differences behind us and have lots of fun. Thank you for not being afraid to point out where I'm wrong (no this does not mean that you can do it any more than you already do) and for giving me someone to boss around. Last of all, thank you for your humble (most of the time) spirit, and your ability to apologize to others, it has truly challenged me!

Mrs. Cyndi Warren- Thank you so much for blending spiritual encouragement with writing advice. Every email from you blessed and inspired me more than you can know. You truly have the gift of kindness and encouragement!

Mrs. Bonnie- For getting me to the writers conference in the first place and for making me feel welcome. It is where I recieved so much inspiration and I believe that God has used it in a wonderful way.

Jenna DeWitt- For being a nice editor! lol And for keeping such a good attitude while dealing with my inexperience.

Allie Lloyd- Thank you for the deep discussions and letting me know that I was not the only one struggling with different things. Thank you also for being a wonderful sounding board, for me to bounce all of my scattered writing ideas off of, and for getting just as excited about them as me!

One last thank you to my family. You are all more precious to me than any other thing in this world (the fact that I love Jesus the most is a given) and I will always treasure the time I spend with you. Love you all!